Family Picture

Family Picture

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

RAW GRACE



**It is never easy to bare a soul, to tell a story that makes you vulnerable.  But when it is SO good, sometimes GOD quietly says, use your voice.  So as I preach MY grace story, I ask for grace upon grace poured out as well.**

You guys…I have a story to tell.  A story that I hope most of you know deep in your soul and can say ya that’s old news.  A story that I fear is not preached enough from pulpits, not told enough in homes.  A love story of God’s grace and freedom.  So I have known Jesus my whole life.  I have believed in him, known the story of the cross.  But I haven’t found true grace, life giving grace until about 2-3 months ago.  And know that God has revealed it to me, I want to shout it from the rooftops!!  I’ve read about it, I’ve read about the people who become so infatuated with the love of God that they go and tell everyone.  They just can’t hold in such good news.  I’ve heard of it, when they are told the story and they are then baptized and then they go and run and tell everyone.  I’ve heard of it happening in days like these, I’ve read it in the bible.  And now it is finally my turn.  God’s love has gotten a hold of me so fiercely that I want everyone to know.  But my heart aches, my heart aches because it’s the brother in law saying that 90% of American church preaches the negative message.  The sinner message.  Where is the saved by grace, furious love part?  I feel like it is time to start over.  Start fresh.  He has given me that opportunity and I hand it over to all of you.  To a hurting world.  To hurting souls. 

I have always knew of grace but never was really able to embrace the freedom and love that came with it. I always thought it was only if I was holy and good enough could I receive it.  It was only when I let go and could truly say to God that I would never be good enough but that I knew his grace was more than enough that I could experience true freedom, true life.  I walked around only halfway loving my kids, my husband, my family because I was only allowing myself to experience halfway love from God.  I wouldn’t allow myself to truly allow God to work in my life.  Because I surely wasn’t good enough.  I messed up every single day.  How can he really love me?  And man this is an awful place to live from, all pent up, trying harder, using your own strength.  Instead of just letting go and letting God.  But the scary part for me was that I thought I was letting go and letting God.  I just couldn’t wrap my head around his crazy love and grace and that he loved me just the way I am.  And so he has slowly and carefully and widely opened my eyes.  Opened my eyes to an incredible love that I am so thankful for. 

And so it is the woman at church who I love so dearly who came to me in her fleshly body with the words of Jesus.  I love you.  Stop being so hard on yourself.  And she wrapped me in her love and showed me just how much Jesus longed for me and loved me.  And although she came to me in the flesh, I know it was God making himself real through her to me.  To truly knock me over the head and SEE.  I am a stubborn sort and so he had to use all means to get through to me. J  And you guys this changed everything.  Everything.  How I love, how I receive love, how I experience JOY.  And man I am so so grateful.  Beyond words grateful.

And so YOU ALL need to know over and over and over that God loves you!!  More than anything in the whole wide world, HE LOVES YOU!!  With a never ending, pursuing ferocious love.  He doesn’t love you just when you are good.  He loves you always.  When you mess up, he picks up your broken pieces and hugs you.  He doesn’t even ask what you did or why, he just wants you to run full force into his arms for a HUGE hug.  He wants you close, in his arms, to be fully loved.  He wants you to know the true freedom that comes from knowing and understanding his gracious love.  People, don’t live trying to be perfect and holy and in a box, just live fully YOU!!  Live outside the box, in a huge grace filled, freedom filled GLORY story.  God has given it ALL to us.  Not just a little bit, but every single thing.  Every experience, every person, every nature beauty, every story.  It is all his GIFT!!  And he just asks us to breathe deep, to accept the gift and to walk with him through it all.