Family Picture

Family Picture

Friday, May 24, 2013


So my posts the last couple of months have been a little depressing, dark, maybe a bit scary!! Ha!  It is just the messiness of adoption and life.  We are ALL GOOD!!  But today I wanted to share blessings.  So many blessings on this journey.  We are blessed to walk this journey of obedience with our Heavenly Father and watch him shape and change our family.  We are blessed to fight for these boys, to work through ALL of the facets of adoption and to learn and grow in HUGE ways.  Please read the most amazing post about international adoption and fighting for the orphan by my dear adoptive mama friend (May 23 post)

We are blessed as we work through the boys' pasts and come to understand what life is like in another country.  We are blessed as we realize we cannot take for granted all that we have.  We are blessed as we realize we have a GREAT responsibility to do more in this life.  To do more for the orphan, for the widow, for the poor in this world.  We have SO SO much and the best thing we can do is to give our life away, give it away to help the least of these, the ones God loves.  We are blessed as we learn that our sweet boys have been through more in their short little lives than we can even fathom.  We are blessed because it helps us focus on what really matters in this life.  We ask God to heal hurts, to help us process, to help us understand.  I read a quote somewhere that said that you do not really care about the orphan when you just see a picture or some facts, but when you hold that orphan in your arms EVERYTHING CHANGES!!  Yes!  We are so so blessed to hold these children in our arms everyday.  

We are blessed because our hearts are broken for the things that break God's heart.  For our boys and for all the children in the DRC.

I found a ministry that does amazing work in the DRC.  Read the stories of these children here:

Let your heart be broken for what breaks God's heart.  Read these stories. These kids need sponsors, they need food and an education.  Please consider sponsorship.

Our life is a blessing, every moment, every day.  God walks beside us every second.  Our relationship with him is deep.  Our praises to him are huge.  We are blessed because I cannot imagine for a single second not having these boys in our life.  I cannot imagine for a single second not having my SIX beautiful babies in my life.  Adoption may be messy and a bit scary at times, but it is the biggest BLESSING we have ever received.  Thank you Jesus for blessing us!!!

    Praise the Lord, my soul;
    all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, my soul,
    and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins
    and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit
    and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good    things
    so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

     The Lord works righteousness
    and justice for all the oppressed.
      He made known his ways to Moses,
    his deeds to the people of Israel: The Lord is compassionate and gracious,
    slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse,
    nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
    so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west,
    so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
 As a father has compassion on his children,
    so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed,
    he remembers that we are dust. The life of mortals is like grass,
    they flourish like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone,
    and its place remembers it no more. But from everlasting to everlasting
    the Lord’s love is with those who fear him,
    and his righteousness with their children’s children with those who keep his covenant
    and remember to obey his precepts.
 The Lord has established his throne in heaven,
    and his kingdom rules over all.
Praise the Lord, you his angels,
    you mighty ones who do his bidding,
    who obey his word. Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts,
    you his servants who do his will. Praise the Lord, all his works 
    everywhere in his dominion.
    Praise the Lord, my soul.
         Psalm 103

Friday, May 10, 2013

Two Months Home

Yesterday marked two months since our gotcha day on March 9th.  Hard to believe two months has gone by.  We have been super busy meeting family, spending time with friends and making memories.  Our new normal is here and we are settling in nicely.  Nicely, but not necessarily easily.  This has been a crazy messy and hard two months.  At the same time it has been THE BEST two months of my life.  Nothing draws you closer to God than when you enter into something that requires total dependence on him.  And that is what this adoption journey is, total dependence on the one who is merciful, loving and compassionate.  This is not a 2 week long mission trip where you are dependent on God for 2 weeks for everything and then you go home and enter back into your comfortable life.  This is an everyday leaning and pushing into a God who molds you, guides you, disciplines you and ultimately shows you the way.  It is the most amazing incredible gift to be intimately connected to my Lord and savior this way.  Adjustment has taken time but I feel like we are starting to get over the hump.  And for me, for me I have needed much discipline, pruning, wisdom and guidance that only a Heavenly Father can give on a journey such as this.  And he is working in great ways as I start to to learn, to learn how to love, to learn how to parent a hurting child.  And he is working in great ways as I pray for my boys' hearts to be healed and my girls' hearts to be open to loving those who are hurt and sad.  I know more about psychology and the brain and attachment than I thought I ever would.  I am learning things I never thought I would.  And it is AMAZING!!!  Our boys are loving, sweet, kind, helpful and they are also fearful and hurt.  But God has blessed us with the wisdom each day to heal the hurts and to love well.  I am excited to continue to watch these beautiful boys grow physically and emotionally.  They will be world changers!!!  My constant prayer has been that my children would come to know Jesus, that they would love him with all their heart, that they would serve with all their heart and that they would live out the fullness of life that he has called them to.  This is the only thing that matters!!  When all of your comforts are stripped away, you realize the only thing that matters is Jesus.  I don't care how well my kids do in school, I don't care if they have a nice house and three kids and a dog someday, in fact I pray that their hearts would be broken for the things that break God's heart and that their life would be a challenge lived for Christ alone!!  God is doing great things in our life these days and I cannot wait to see what the future holds for us and our world changing kids!!  

 This is our prayer these days:

I will pray for you now, for you have been my faithful friends
While the road we walk is difficult indeed
I couldn't not ask for more than what you've already been
Only that you would say these prayers for me
May your heart break enough that compassion enters in
May your strength all be spent upon the weak
All the castles and crowns you build and place upon your head
May they all fall, come crashing down around your feet
May you find every step to be harder than the last
So your character grows greater every stride
May your company be of humble insignificance
May your weakness be your only source of pride 

From the song Pray by Kendall Payne